We Are Not Abstract Thinkers: Critical African Consciousness Still Exists

We Are Not Abstract Thinkers: Critical African Consciousness Still Exists.

By Takura Zhangazha*

 

There are certain things that will always remain politically abstract.  Except for your own political choices and what they may mean to you personally. 

Many of us are almost politically predetermined.  By way of individual experience.  Either we were involved in the Zimbabwean liberation struggle, lost lives close to us in the same or experienced Gukurahundi in the early to late 1980s. 

We are therefore shaped by what we emotionally consider our own personal opinions as based on our own, again, personal experiences. 

There is never time for a holistic approach.  Everything is almost as written in historical stone.  Almost as though we are going to be arguing about ethnic issues concerning, where you were born, what your ancestors did to mine, and why we should continue fighting over the same. 

These are things that cannot be wished away.  It is part of our very abstract national consciousness.  One which we have allowed to exist within the ambit of an equally shallow desire for universal recognition of a false recovery at meeting the requirements of a the proverbial “white gaze”. 

One of the most infamous lines from the famous Zimbabwean writer Dambudzo Marechera that I still cannot fully understand is the one that reads, “ We are what we are not, that is the paradox of fiction. ”  

As complicated as that literal line may sound, it is would remain evident that we do indeed leave ambiguous “consciousness’ lives.”  Almost like a battle between personal, other regarding and familial desire. 

Like we have to lie to ourselves about what matters the most about who we are, who we can be and who we ideally should be. 

There are things you have to crosscheck about what you have to be ‘essential’ about.  It can be about money, keeping your partner happy, your extended family satisfied at your role or even ignoring all of the above.  But existentially you need a value system that transcends your own personal desires.  It must somehow find a way to be shared.  For personal or work related validation.   Moreso where it relates to your own personal health challenges that others may not know or care about. 

So you can walk into a library and crosscheck your African history.  Or alternatively link up how Rodney wrote on “ How Europe Underdeveloped Africa”  and use one form or the other of a scientific method to prove that he was not entirely accurate.  But principally he was correct. 

The triple C’s ( three C’s) of David Livingston, Christianity, Commerce and Civilisation were never a good idea for the black peoples of Zimbabwe.  Let alone Southern Africa.

I have referred to a critical African National Consciousness.  And it indeed exists.  It is under pillows, in workshops, in dry satirical humour, but most Africans, particularly black Africans know who they are. 

It is almost as abstract as asking a question like “ Did we fight a liberation war in Zimbabwe?”  The evident answer is, Yes”.  And that it’s not even a rumour. It happened. 

Or asking us, again in an abstract sense, “ Did black people have a contradictory envy of white people?” Reply would again be yes.  Except for different reasons.

We would have to repeat/argue the sensitive topic raised by Marechera, and for purposes of clarity, “We are what we are not. That is the paradox of fiction”. 

Even if we wanted to dismiss ourselves we remain confronted with the reality of who we meet, who we make deals with and who we share the same ideas with.

Sadly there are fewer and far between cdes that we still share similar social democratic and democratic socialist values with. 

It gets awkward with each passing year but its understandable.  Even Bob Marley sang that we lost god friends along the way.  But to be honest, “ Zvimwe zvacho, mazvokuda mavanga enyora”.

You have overnight conversation with cdes, laugh, lean, learn and remember those gone on.  You also over intellectualize what others don’t really prioritise and you learn to handle yourself.

But at the back of your mind you remember that “Fuck it” you never owed an explanation to anybody except your mom and father about who they think, thought you became.

I have never argued myself out of existence.  Nor tried to argue another human being out of the same.  Occasionally I get bored. I also get broke. Like a scholarship power and promise of the future thing. We will get lost either way.  I am still waiting for the sort of assumed rain. Out of Respect.